| Pebbles |
The currency used in STONE. |
47271o |
| 400 Bad Request client Rooibos |
Sip. Malfunction. Repeat. |
2 |
| Anti-polymorph Protection Emblem |
An item that cancels out a Polymorph Protection Emblem. |
1 |
| Bag o' Tricks |
Full of nefarious goodies. Maybe it has something that will help you steal an item off of someone else. |
2 |
| Bioluminescent Robe |
Gives you that fungal glow, without the spores. Probably. |
1 |
| Boy Button |
An item that turns the owner into a boy. |
1 |
| Bubble Robe |
How...how does it even stay together? The bubbles won't break. It's mesmerizing. |
1 |
| Ceremonial Robes |
Wow. So silky. You're special now. |
1 |
| Chrysalis Robe |
Makes you look like whoever you want to be. No refunds if you emerge weirder. |
1 |
| Cursed D20 |
Guaranteed to roll 1s when you need it most |
1 |
| Disco Robe |
A mirrorball-like wonder. May cause spontaneous dance-offs, and marriage proposals. |
1 |
| Ferrari |
What do you mean \"which model?\" It's a Ferrari. Vroom Vroom. |
1 |
| Frequent Flushing Miles |
ONLY FOR THE FLUSHED! Have you been flushed once? Buy one. Been flushed twice? Buy two, and so on. |
1 |
| Handmade Card |
I made this with my own little hands, you couldn't wish for more! Fingerpaints, glitter and stickers galore! Hugs. |
1 |
| Ilmarinen Forging Gloves |
Heat-resistant. Marriage counseling not included. |
1 |
| Ineffable Robe of Bureaucratic Invisibility |
Makes you entirely unnoticeable to any government agency. Including the tax office. |
1 |
| Infinity Dagger |
Never misses. Never dulls. Never stops whispering in your head… |
1 |
| Jörmungandr Friendship Bracelet |
Elastic, shiny, slightly damp. Bites if removed improperly. |
1 |
| Less |
Less is more. |
1 |
| Luxurious Robe |
Made from the plushest velvet known to man, with gold trim and embroidered with your number. |
1 |
| Middlefinger Splushie |
SpiP #200 - Don't let the name fool you! This little guy will always be your number one cheerleader, psychologist, and ultimate problem solver, he just might flip you off while doing it. Scratch that...he definitely will. |
1 |
| Miniature Kraken-In-A-Jar |
Cuddly. Possibly vengeful. |
1 |
| Moonlight Dagger |
Elegant form, decorated with opal gemstones. Gets an eerie glow at full moon... |
1 |
| Nonpolitical Robe |
Equipped with special spiralian shit- and politics-sensors, this robe will temporarily stun anyone in your vicinity if there is even a whiff of politics, giving you time to flee. Thick velvet lining, a shiny bluish glow, deep pockets and a stash for treats. |
1 |
| NyQuil Night Blend |
For when you REALLY need to sleep. |
1 |
| Octarine Lollipop |
Each eighth lick tastes like a different kind of chaos. |
1 |
| Omnitool Replica |
Looks cool. Solves nothing. Satisfies everything. |
1 |
| Pan-Galactic Gargle-Blaster |
Grants stealth by causing observers to momentarily forget your existence. |
1 |
| Polymorph Protection Emblem |
An item that protects the owner from changing form. |
1 |
| Portable Hole |
A hole in space-time. Where does it go? Nobody knows. |
1 |
| Potion of Acceptable Social Interactions |
You know why. |
1 |
| Potion of Existential Dread |
Makes you realize the futility of life. Somehow still a popular purchase. |
2 |
| Potion of False Confidence |
Good for karaoke and half-baked ideas. |
1 |
| Prenta Prouty |
A perfectly geometrical rock, or sorts. The way you feel affects its color. |
1 |
| Probo Praily |
A small, harmless creature with a beautiful shell. It's color reflects the weather. |
1 |
| Red Satin Robe |
Shiny, smooth and flowing, with medium pockets and a color that hides bloodstains perfectly. |
1 |
| Reversible Robe |
Dramatically sparkly and edgy on one side, soft and nap-friendly on the other. |
1 |
| Robe of Polychromatic Liberation |
Every color you were told not to wear. Wear them all! |
1 |
| Robe of Rain |
This rainbow colored meteorological robe that will alert you of incoming rain by singing the Gene Kelly hit 'I'm Singing in the Rain' for you and turning waterproof. Keeps you dry and provides you with a cup of tea whenever it rains. Two pockets, dagger holder, slippery feel. |
1 |
| Scroll of Petty Miracles |
Cures hiccups. Summons tiny rainclouds. |
1 |
| Sexy Sinjury Poster |
Depicts sauce being poured over a bunch of tentacles on a bed of rice. |
1 |
| Spam-flavored Milkshake |
No one asked for this. That’s why it’s here. |
1 |
| Sparkly Glitter Robe |
Shine brighter than your dagger! Multicolored sequins that change color according to your mood. Two pockets, fuzzy lining. |
1 |
| Special Untrackable Smart Phone |
It's a smart phone that doesn't listen to you or record shit without your consent. |
1 |
| Spider Silk Robe |
Indestructible and insanely light, let's you move like a shadow. Weaved by Spiralian Tower Spiders. |
1 |
| Starlight Robe |
Legally classified as a minor celestial body in 3 jurisdictions. |
1 |
| Thor's Travel-Sized Storm Jar |
Unleashes thunderclouds over your enemies’ picnics. |
1 |
| Tower Rations |
A tin of essentials; clump of fresh meat, 1 x celery cake, 1 x spiral baguette, box of \"raisins\", 1 x sippy-cup of sacrificial juice. |
1 |
| Tower Towel |
Just about the most massively useful thing that one can carry |
1 |
| Towering Tool Belt |
Holds all your essential Tower-tinkering-tools, such as your dagger, chloroform, cookies and rocks. |
1 |
| Ultimate Robe 9000 |
Shine. Stealth. Tassels. Pockets. Straps. Hooks. Gadgets. Power. Prestige. Glory. |
1 |
| Valkyrie Wing Clips |
Adds flair and temporary levitation to any hairstyle. |
2 |
| Vault-Tec Lunchbox |
Contains randomized loot, sometimes confetti, sometimes bottle caps, sometimes… worse. |
1 |
| Veles' Beard Oil |
Enhances charm and plausible deniability. |
1 |
| Zarking Fardwangle Fizzbombs |
Explodes in your mouth. In a good way. Usually. |
1 |