| 208529 o |
The currency used in SPONGE. |
| Welcome Mat |
Your door is always open |
| The Letter I |
Imagine inheriting interest implementing investments. |
| Ice-Machine |
It just keeps playing 'Ice, ice, baby' on repeat. |
| Mouse Costume |
Live among the mice as if you were one of their own. |
| Cask of Sparlor Wine |
A dark, dusky and dangerously nutty red with slight undertones of tears of the YEETed. |
| An Eternity |
You now have an eternity. What are you gonna do with it. |
| Pristine Snowflake |
Absolutely one-of-a-kind and immaculately preserved. |
| Box of Chocolates |
You never know what you're gonna get. Except caramel, there's always some caramel in there. |
| Waterproof Raincoat |
This thing is so waterproof that you have to dry clean it. |
| Spring |
Boing! |
| 1000 Candles |
Like that one song. |
| Maalstr0m Splushie |
SpiP #006 - The strongest plushie around! Dispenses random penis & animal facts. Has pretty beads in his beard. |
| Bubble Robe x2 |
How...how does it even stay together? The bubbles won't break. It's mesmerizing. |
| Sonic Splushie |
SpiP #145 - Has a pancake on his head. If you remove his pancake he'll scream AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! |
| Ring of the Fisherman |
Uh.. Someone in the Vatican might be looking for this. Or does this make you the new Pope?! |
| Nylock Splushie |
SpiP #002 - Randomly loses and grows appendages. Won't shut up about being banned twice. Comes with tiny boat and earplugs. |
| Snakes Splushie |
SpiP #055 - Got snakes? The coolest bartender ever! Comes with sooo many snakes, but she still needs MORE! MORE!! |
| Bibble Splushie |
SpiP #001 - The bestest & bibbliest Skit is now your BFF! He's got pockets full of shiny pebbles, and he'll grant you 29 o a day for being so awesome. |
| Tentacle of Sins |
Fully functional grappling-tentacle. Snap, whip, hoist, lasso and squish your friends and foes with ease! |
| Auntie Ev Splushie |
SpiP #335 - The sweetest badass auntie of the Tower! Always ready with a tiny whip and a cuppa tea! |
| Huh Splushie |
SpiP #835 - He's got pockets full of bacteria, and he ain't afraid to use 'em! Plays a tiny guitar at random times. You better applaud.. |
| Revesvans Splushie |
SpiP #202 - Handsomely clad in his traditional norwegian Bunad! Writes wickedly awesome fantasy novels for you, signed copies, of course. |
| Apollina Splushie |
SpiP #044 - The perfectly optimized plushie for hugs! Pure sunshine in cuddle-form. GLOMP! |
| Mustelid Splushie |
SpiP #257 - The most wholesome and helpful friend! Sings the blues beautifully, especially around water and birds. |
| Towering Tool Belt x2 |
Holds all your essential Tower-tinkering-tools, such as your dagger, chloroform, cookies and rocks. |
| Sustainable Robe |
Stitched together from pre-owned pieces of fabrics gathered from flushed sacrifices. |
| Sexy Sinjury Poster |
Depicts sauce being poured over a bunch of tentacles on a bed of rice. |
| GeePedicy Splushie |
SpiP #122 - The OG Gee, sweet as can be! Equipped with cool Jewish facts and pockets full of endless celery! Do not offer him carrots. |
| Mitt Splushie |
SpiP #911 - Who you gonna call? MITTHRAWNURUO! Solid as a rock. Poke at your own risk. Comes with a very peculiar arsenal and first-aid kit. |
| Bookworm Bob |
The bravest and most brilliant of worms. Found in the library. He had built himself a pagoda out of old fishing manuals. |
| Proton Pack |
It's ratting, like it's about to explode...? Grants a mystery flair for a week. |
| Scary Stories of the Tower x2 |
An anthology of bone-chilling and cursed tales. The pages were found behind a bricked up wall in the tombs.. |
| Fuzzy Maal Wall Rug |
Garish and captivating, extra fuzzy, massively muscly and decorated with sparkly beads. Hand-woven by skilled tentacles. Also doubles as a warm quilt. |
| Slippery Swimwear |
Should you happen to have to take a dive down the pipes, this might come in very handy. |
| Camouflage Robe |
Perfect for ambushing and stalking fresh meat in the hedge maze. Big hood, many pockets, waterproof. |
| Ice Bathed Sealnog |
Hits you right in the noggin'! Brewed in the icy fresh waters of Sweden by the cuddliest seal you've ever seen! |
| Holy Water Bottle |
Quench your sinful thoughts or scold your demonic pals with water blessed by the Rudest of Ministers, the Pastor Sarcastor. |
| Floor Floosher 4000 |
Syrup on your ceiling? Pesky slices of pizza on the floor? Not anymore! Your personal Floor Floosher can clean your floor in under 94 hours! |
| How To Spiral 101 |
What is this place? What do the numbers mean? Help, I got flushed? Find weird answers for all your questions! |
| Tower Rations x2 |
A tin of essentials; clump of fresh meat, 1 x celery cake, 1 x spiral baguette, box of "raisins", 1 x sippy-cup of sacrificial juice. |
| Sunbathing Penguin |
No one knows how he got here, but he could use a friend to help him get to the top floor to sunbathe by the pool, he can't waddle up stairs and elevators scare him. |
| Spiral Slippers |
Fluffy, soft and oh so warm. They're blood-proof, checkered and very silent to walk in as well. |
| UnU Splushie |
SpiP #012 - Fluffy, cute and fierce! As the king, she comes equipped with a tiny crown, customized art and a tiny alien companion. |
| Silver Sheep |
His name is Bert. The name is misleading, as you can only harvest steel wool off of him. May poop oven cleaner if fed enough celery. |
| Nuclear HAZMAT Suit |
Extremely resistant to radiation. Not at all resistant to stabbing. |
| The One Token |
Celebrated the One year anniversary of the Tower, took part in the sacrificial blood ritual and had some pie. |
| Relaxation |
Just what I needed. |
| Secret Safari Maps |
Meticulously crafted by the man, the myth and the Scott himself. Ready for an adventure? If you can't bring Scott with you, this is the next best thing to have. |
| Python Quiz |
How many pythons does it take to build a bomb? How many pythons have been found in the Spiral toilets? How many pythons tall is the Tower? |
| Inflatable FLUSH Suit |
In case of flushing, the suit automatically inflates making your FLUSH a luxurious and relaxing float as you go for a joyride down the pipes. |
| Asherjade Splushie |
SpiP #032 - A feisty little fisherman from the Tower mote! Tiny model airplane, fancy fishing lures and delicious pie included. |
| Emotional Support |
There for you, friend. |
| Handmade Card x2 |
I made this with my own little hands, you couldn't wish for more! Fingerpaints, glitter and stickers galore! Hugs. |
| Potatoes |
PO-TA-TOES. |
| Mulberry Splushie |
SpiP #093 - Are you sure you can handle this plushie? It might make you...blushie. Comes with blindfold, whips and beautiful melodies. |
| Fancy Spiral Bouquet |
A stunning bouquet of gorgeous roses from the Tower gardens, colorful Spiral hydrangeas and scented hyacinths. |
| Tooting Jetpack |
Useful for traversing up floors quickly. Makes a distinct tooting sound and poofs out a cloud of blue smoke now and then. Pretty sure it works.. |
| Ruby Slippers |
With a click of your heels, you're teleported down to the Tower Gardens. |
| Sphinx of Riddles and Ribs |
This enigmatic creature still poses perplexing riddles to travelers, but its true passion lies in barbecue. When it's not challenging adventurers with mind-bending conundrums, it's firing up the grill and hosting epic cookouts. |
| Gryphon's Gourmet Grub x2 |
These gourmet rations are fit for a king – or at least a gryphon. It’s seeds. Just seeds, but the name makes you want them more, right? Right? |
| Pocket-sized Port-a-Portal Parchment |
This magical parchment, paired with a crayon of your choice, allows adventurers to create temporary portals to different levels of the endless tower. |
| Bumbling Basilisk |
Unlike its fearsome counterpart, this basilisk can't turn you to stone - it's too busy tripping over its own tail! Instead of striking fear into the hearts of adventurers, it provides comic relief with its clumsy antics and comical attempts at intimidation. |
| Electric Robe |
Shockingly blue and shines like lightning. Sparks randomly and emits a low electrical hum as you move. |
| Moonlight Dagger x2 |
Elegant form, decorated with opal gemstones. Gets an eerie glow at full moon... |
| Kelpie-Kraken |
A terrifying hybrid of a kelpie and a kraken, this monstrous half horse and half octopus sea creature is the eight-legged horse Sleipnir’s forgotten cousin. She sings beautifully, and comes with a fancy bathtub for your crib. |
| Octarine Lollipop |
Each eight lick tastes like a different kind of chaos. |
| Fairy Dust Pop Rocks |
Makes you sparkle. |
| Giggle Gummy Bears |
Bursts into fits of barely controlled laughter when you bite into it. Has the same effect on you in approximately 30 minutes later. |
| Hydrogen-powered Convertible Humvee |
On sale for 33334. An import from Franksgard, well-suited for off-roading or zooming down a highway while blasting music! |
| Steve Schaubs Library Card |
Grants the bearer permanent access (no more need for day passes) to the Franksgard University Library, its collections, and its workshops. |
| Stower Speedos |
Funky, slick and hotter than the basement furnace. Perfect for slip-n-sliding down some flushy pipes and basking at the pool. All eyes on you! |
| Spiral Cloak of Confusion |
Confused? Wanting to confuse further? This is the cloak for masters of kung-fusion and conning cultusion. What? Ah, working as intended. |
| Free Hugs |
Sometimes a good hug is very important. And so are you, friend. |
| Spiral Rug Cutters |
Suede soles, beautiful wallflower-pattern, 1 inch heels, indestructible toes for dancing with beginners or kicking pipes, and ventilation to avert foot stench for up to 8h. |
| Worse Triple Hat |
There once was the ultimate hat, three hats in one. For any weather, party of activity, it was always just right. This is the worse version of it, which is still better than any other hat. |
| Tinned Tower Tuna Treats x3 |
Whether you're on the verge of starvation, a cat owner, or craving a spiral delicacy, these nutrient packed fishy treats will hit the spot! With a shelf-life of over 3028 years, you can really savour them. |
| Lit Tower Phaser |
When there's something strange in your neighborhood... Perfect for stunning, shocking, lighting it up, and of course; groovy spiral raves. |
| Stower Pelt Hair |
What a pelt! So beautiful! Warm! Thick! Lustrous! Cuddly! Burly! What animal is it from? That's.. That's besides the point. Just look at it! |
| ReactsWithWords Splushie |
SpiP #058 - YES, he reacts to your words! No pre-recorded jargon! Comes with a MASSIVE stack of teeny tiny maps & floor plans and a cool tour guide hat. You'll never be lost if you have him along. Also functions as a brilliant little jukebox. |
| Mylvee Splushie |
SpiP #104 - hungry. bites you. prions are scary. dinat dinat do. death by glamour. milk. two planets approach the roche limit. bal man. walk don't run. battle for dream island. we are eternal. eepy. |
| Fabulous Bouquet |
Absolutley beautifully arranged bouquet. Anyone receiving one would surely be flattered. |
| Broken Car |
It's beat up and broken, but you look at it fondly. |
| Root 88 Dagger |
Exquisitly made, but it's wooden. |
| Lore Whip Taters |
The bestest organic tower-taters, lovingly grown, having passed of old age and filled with wisdom - this whip is steeped in delicious Stower lore. |
| Azure Dagger |
Glistens like lightning and glows when it rains. Forged from the finest blue Spiralian Steel. |
| Towering Tulips x2 |
The most gorgeous tulips from the Spiral gardens, grown with that special....fertilizer. Intoxicating scent, may cause hallucinations. Colors as bright as your presence, as strong as your spirit. Wow! |
| Impressive Iceberg |
Lassoed from the Spiral glaciers and dragged to the tower for your enjoyment! Filled with several secret slippery passages, slides and tunnels. Doubles as an ice-machine. Wheeeeee! |
| Spiral Supernova |
A delightfully gigormous bouquet of freshly picked flowers from the Spiral gardens. The colors are a feast for the eyes and the scent is almost as lovely as you! |
| Soothing Spiral Tea |
A bag of the tastiest blend from the Spiral gardens. Hints of spiralian roses, turnips, mustard and steel. You'll be surprised how soothing it is! |
| Black Kitten |
One of a littler of 6 red-eyed kittens that were found under the floorboards of the Spiral sacrificial chambers. Look into its eyes, it's almost as if it cast a spell on you.. You have been chosen. |
| Haunted Spiral Coin |
Proof of surviving Halloween 2024 in the clutches of the spooky Spiral. |
| Pack of Blood |
What do you mean? Of course it's fake blood.. Why? What have you heard? |
| Sheety Robe |
A plain white 100% cotton robe made from our old sheets; recycling at its best! Two regular pockets, medium hood, nothing too fancy. Doubles as a ghost costume. |
| Boo Brew |
Enjoy a pint of the Spiral's finest Halloween ale! Hints of pumpkin, blood, sweat, and tears. Cheers, friend! |
| Blessed Bloodrobe |
Tie-dyed in countless shades of deep red, with a black satin lining, hidden pockets and a pouch for treats. Blessed by the Spiral spirits. |
| Handful of Treats |
For looking so fabulous, being so wonderful, and just for showing up! Enjoy! |
| Sidekick Spirit |
The presence of a once flushed friend, always by your side. Summon the Stowerling you miss dearly, or gift this to a friend to always be around them, in the good and the bad. |
| Dagger of Pump |
A curved Spiralian steel blade with intricate carved runes. The handle is ancient amber, which when squeezed three times will emit a bright orange glow, lighting up even the darkest halls. |
| Preserved Pumpkin Pie |
A prehistoric slice of presumptuously poignant pumpkin pie, found in the sealed-off kitchen underneath the Spiral fields. It has a kick to it! Don't operate heavy machinery under the influence of this pie. |
| Special Halloween Dagger |
Black blade with spiral damascus, orange wooden handle with skeleton pins and a pumpkin pommel. |
| Reapers Robe |
Smooth black velvet, lush orange silk lining. Enormous and ominous hood. Silver skull detailing. Endless pockets. Extra swooshy. |
| Hunky DTI Costume |
Be the man himself! Banhammer, yorkshire pudding and english accent included. |
| Lucifer Splushie |
SpiP #666 - Our tiny overlord in all his glory! Pitchfork, hellfire and evil plans included. Only available on Halloween. |
| Sinjury Costume |
Move in the shadows, spreading glitter wherever you go. Very tentacly, extra squish. |
| Bag of Spiral Delight |
This delicious assortment of candy includes: sour spirals, liquorice towers, DTI's dynamites, marshmallow Ma'ams, flushdrops, sinful squishies, bibble bubbles, musky mulberries, gummy snakes, salty daggers, tooting potatoes and fizzy frogs. |
| R3cl41m3r Splushie |
SpiP #41 - This adventurous little pilgrim insists you take him exploring through the tower and on all your journeys! Randomly recites poetry and latin phrases. Comes with tiny tarot cards, in case of emergency. |
| Hefty Ceramic Mug |
Fired in the hellfire below the tower, this massive mug will serve as a daily workout as you sip your favourite beverage or sacrificial wine. |
| Pink Rockin' Robe |
Blindingy HOT pink velvet with an irresistibly silky lining and more pockets than you'll ever need! Perfect for collecting things and storing treasure. Turns into a pillow when needed. |
| Tower Bat |
Chills in your room upside down, ventures out at night. Likes it when you read Dracula to him. |
| Angry Tree Nog |
You've never had nog like this before. Brewed in the Tower's tallest tree, by the angriest of frogs. |
| Jolly Dagger |
An ornamental double-edged dagger with a gilded blade, red handle, and a big jinglebell-pommel. The double edge makes it perfect for carving ham, cutting up gingerbreadmen and slicing cheeses. Merry daggering! |
| Kiro's Kandy Kanes |
These aren't your ordinary candy canes! Not only do they have the delicious twisting pattern, but they'll twist your tongue too! Guaranteed you'll be speaking in tongues, but it's worth it. |
| Sparkly Spiral Turds |
Don't let the name fool you, the chocolate is top notch and the decorations are masterful! Eating more than two at a time might make you unusually giddy. |
| Spiral Herbs of Warmth |
A special selection of the finest seasonal spiral herbs, only harvested during Christmas-time. May cause extraordinary niceness and warm fuzzy feels when added to any dish, or sprinkled on a friend. |
| Spiral Jinglebell |
Attached to any garment, the jingle you create will absolutely dazzle those nearby. Perfect for hypnotizing just about anyone, or just getting jiggy with it! |
| Muscly Gingerbreadmen |
Ma'am has been baking too, how do you think he got those muscles?! Here's proof, a tin of delicious little muscle-ma'ams, yum! |
| Derpy's Derpy Deers |
Little Derpy has been baking away, and here's a tin of the derpiest little reindeer-cookies ever! Almost too derpy to eat, no? They're so adorable! |
| Jingly Spiral Ornament |
A softly jingling golden little memento of celebrating Christmas 2024 in the Spiral Tower. |
| Squishy Tentacles of Cheer |
Like a squish in pastry form! Baked with love by a thousand tentacles, quite quickly too! Squishy texture, creamy filling, and sprinkles on top, of course. Qam oou iilth ez i awtgsshu amun on'ma! |
| Cliffy's Festive Froggies |
It is FLUSHmas, my dudes. |
| Colorful Spiral Lights |
Deck the halls, floors and your own window too - in these retro-styled and funky-colored little spiral lights! Very cheerful, super cozy. |
| Cool Mike Splushie |
SpiP #5000 - He's Mike, he's the coolest! Pockets full of teeny rocks & minerals, comes with a tiny rock collecting kit and amazing facts. He ROCKS! |