| 2098 o |
The currency used in SPONGE. |
| Robe of Too Many Pockets |
You’ll lose everything, stylishly. |
| Copper Ingot of Ea-Nasir (Absolutely Terrible Quality) |
You deserve better. But here we are. |
| Potion of Acceptable Social Interactions |
You know why. |
| Earmuffs of Selective Hearing |
Blocks out whining, unwanted feedback, and passive-aggressive suggestions. |
| Bottle of Pirate's Booty Rum |
Aged in the barrels of lost ships. Smells like adventure, tastes like trouble. |
| Fedora of Unconvincing Authority |
Great for trying to herd cats. |
| 5-pack of Underwear |
Good quality. Some packs come with a secret tie-dye pair. |
| Zarking Fardwangle Fizzbombs |
Explodes in your mouth. In a good way. Usually. |
| Perun's Group Chat Logs |
Just Perun yelling at Veles in all caps. Ends mid-rant. |
| Cyberpunk Visor of Optimistic Nihilism |
See the future in glitchy neon. |
| Omnitool Replica |
Looks cool. Solves nothing. Satisfies everything. |
| FLUSH! T-Shirt |
I SURVIVED THE FLUSH AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET THIS T-SHIRT, I BOUGHT IT! |
| Camouflage Robe |
Perfect for ambushing and stalking fresh meat in the hedge maze. Big hood, many pockets, waterproof. |
| Beach Towel of Perfect Sand Repulsion |
Never gritty. Always soft. |
| Scented Candle: Library Fuzz |
Smells like old books and slightly dusty comfort. |
| Curse Removal Kit (Beginner) |
Includes duct tape and a kazoo. |
| Mulberry Splushie |
SpiP #093 - Are you sure you can handle this plushie? It might make you...blushie. Comes with blindfold, whips and beautiful melodies. |
| Modular Bookmark |
Includes 12 detachable tabs and a tiny flag. |
| Cactus Pencil (Mildly Spiky) |
Improves spelling and handwriting via threat. |
| 400 Bad Request client Rooibos |
Sip. Malfunction. Repeat. |