| Pebbles |
The currency used in STONE. |
5305o |
| The Complete Works of Cathal-Oh-Really |
"All the novels, plays, articles and other stupid shite passion projects Cathal-Oh-Really has ever written. Well, not the early works, they're far too embarrassing. Disclaimer: half of them are in Ulster Irish and one is in fairly bad Bosnian so good luck with those." |
1 |
| Poorly Forged Ring |
“A rather lumpy but recognizable ring made of what appears to be gold. Has ‘One Ring’ written on the inside curve in red marker. Will probably scratch you if you try to wear it but that’s about it.” |
1 |
| 'I flipped the switch' trolley t-shirt. |
"A t-shirt bearing a picture of a trolley, which indicates your decision-of-choice in that classic ethics dilemma" |
1 |
| Aviar |
"A little bird companion. Some say they grant great gifts." |
1 |
| Tinned Tower Tuna Treats |
Whether you're on the verge of starvation, a cat owner, or craving a spiral delicacy, these nutrient packed fishy treats will hit the spot! With a shelf-life of over 3028 years, you can really savour them. |
1 |
| Don't Panic Danish |
Served on an artisanal sugar towel. |
1 |
| Spiral Tower Biscuit Tin |
Filled with ginger crush creams, viennese, ballerina cookies, wagon wheels, dog treats, assorted buttons, business cards and that weird tomato with pins stuck in it. Blame Grandma. |
1 |
| Pink Rockin' Robe |
Blindingy HOT pink velvet with an irresistibly silky lining and more pockets than you'll ever need! Perfect for collecting things and storing treasure. Turns into a pillow when needed. |
1 |
| Prenta Prouty |
A perfectly geometrical rock, or sorts. The way you feel affects its color. |
2 |
| Reversible Robe |
Dramatically sparkly and edgy on one side, soft and nap-friendly on the other. |
1 |
| Prixas Priony |
A strange, beautiful flower whose color depends on the angle you view it. |
1 |
| Special Untrackable Smart Phone |
It's a smart phone that doesn't listen to you or record shit without your consent. |
1 |
| Probo Praily |
A small, harmless creature with a beautiful shell. It's color reflects the weather. |
1 |
| Grabby Hand |
It helps you get those things that are just out of reach! |
1 |
| Retro Denim Robe |
Pockets! So many pockets! Durable and cool, with your number hand-stitched onto it. |
1 |
| Used Robe |
Nothing fancy, a little wear-and-tear and the odd bloodstain, but gets the job done! Wonder who's this was.. |
1 |
| Plastic Robe |
I just don't wanna get any blood on me.. It doubles as a raincoat too! Stay dry for every FLUSH! |
1 |
| Cat Button |
And item that turns the owner into a cat. |
1 |
| Tarot Cards |
Unexpectedly bright and cheery looking. Scry your own fortune! |
1 |
| Piggylicious Picture Frame |
Beautiful silver frame with a glamorous picture of Claire. OINK! |
1 |
| Fake Mustard Sandwich |
It's actually a whoopee-cushion! Just wait 'til they take a bite! |
1 |
| Non-descript Cup |
Definitely not full of your favorite alcohol. Grab a few and give em out to your friends! |
1 |
| Early Access Pass |
Your ticket in before anyone else! |
1 |
| Robe of Ruckus |
This shaggy robe is a pure delight! Huge hood with floppy ears, 25 hidden pockets, strange gadgets, trinkets and surprises which vary with each one of these robes. You kinda look like Scooby Doo! |
1 |
| Popy Robe |
Honesty, this might actually be an old pope's robe. White, purple and gold, fancy embroidery, a couple of pockets. Comes with holy water, golden slippers and a fancy hat too! |
1 |
| Safari Scott Splushie |
SpiP #013 - Equipped with full safari-gear and all kinds of wild tales of epic adventures! |
1 |
| Bag of Spiral Delight |
This delicious assortment of candy includes: sour spirals, liquorice towers, DTI's dynamites, marshmallow Ma'ams, flushdrops, sinful squishies, bibble bubbles, musky mulberries, gummy snakes, salty daggers, tooting potatoes and fizzy frogs. |
1 |
| Endless Spud Splushie |
SpiP #101 - PO-TA-TOES! The goodest little squishy spud. Very apeeling. Don't dip him in yogurt, please. |
1 |
| Frequent Flushing Miles |
ONLY FOR THE FLUSHED! Have you been flushed once? Buy one. Been flushed twice? Buy two, and so on. |
1 |
| Nonpolitical Robe |
Equipped with special spiralian shit- and politics-sensors, this robe will temporarily stun anyone in your vicinity if there is even a whiff of politics, giving you time to flee. Thick velvet lining, a shiny bluish glow, deep pockets and a stash for treats. |
1 |
| Bubble Robe |
How...how does it even stay together? The bubbles won't break. It's mesmerizing. |
1 |
| Latex Robe |
High collar, shiny, squeaky and sleek. Attend all sacrifices like sex on a stick. |
1 |
| Basic Black Robe |
Gets the job done, just like you. Built-in holster for your dagger, hidden pocket and light as a feather |
1 |
| Luxurious Robe |
Made from the plushest velvet known to man, with gold trim and embroidered with your number. |
1 |
| Contact Cleaner |
Hey, it works now! |
1 |
| Character Customization Kit |
Change how you portray yourself online! |
1 |
| Lucky Rabbit's Foot |
It's still kickin'! |
1 |
| Väinämöinen's Pick |
Plucks any instrument perfectly, most of the time, but makes you play Polka when it feels like it. |
1 |
| Omnitool Replica |
Looks cool. Solves nothing. Satisfies everything. |
1 |
| Kyonlion Splushie |
SpiP #099 - Rawr! Fluffy as a lion! Has a shirt with lucky 7's all over it and comes with a cute little Kyoncub! |
1 |
| Maalstr0m Splushie |
SpiP #006 - The strongest plushie around! Dispenses random penis & animal facts. Has pretty beads in his beard. |
1 |
| Nylock Splushie |
SpiP #002 - Randomly loses and grows appendages. Won't shut up about being banned twice. Comes with tiny boat and earplugs. |
1 |
| Assfuck Splushie |
SpiP #269 - He's dressed exactly as you'd expect. Randomly asks if you have a Pornhub account. He's adorable, though. |
1 |
| Trophy for Trying Your Best |
Gold-ish. Heavy with pride. |
1 |
| Sinjury Splushie |
SpiP #123 - An abhorrent conjuring of your wildest nightmares, but it gives such warm and cuddly squishes! Warning: Tentacles may multiply. Za awtgsshu wgah uulg'ma ywaq zaix. ULL vera skish! SQUISH! |
1 |
| Middlefinger Splushie |
SpiP #200 - Don't let the name fool you! This little guy will always be your number one cheerleader, psychologist, and ultimate problem solver, he just might flip you off while doing it. Scratch that...he definitely will. |
1 |
| Chamomilitant Seeds |
Tea grown from them is soothing by force. Youll calm down, or it will make you. |
1 |
| Cow Says Splushie |
SpiP #238 - The most beautiful bovine of the Tower; cuddly, fluffy, and with lots to say (a gentle boop will do the trick!). Can fly, can write, can't read though. Definitely BFF material! Moo. |
1 |
| Cute Furry Robe |
Super warm and fuzzy, adorable ears on the hood, hidden pockets, embroidered with your number. |
1 |
| Basic T-Shirt |
It says \"I was YEETed and all I got was this stupid shirt.\" |
1 |
| Tricorder Mini Power Bank |
Scans, stores, and occasionally charges your phone. |
1 |
| Robe of Polychromatic Liberation |
Every color you were told not to wear. Wear them all! |
1 |
| Porcelain Cup of Unrealistic Physics |
Will not shatter when dropped. |
1 |
| Inconveniently Large Hat |
Blocks vision, light, common sense, and sometimes time itself. |
1 |
| Sleep Not Found Cold Brew |
May cause speed typing and the illusion of productivity. |
1 |
| Arcade Token of Infinite Continues |
Warning: Doesnt work on real life. |
1 |
| Skald's Whispering Inkpot |
Only writes poetry (of uneven quality). Mostly about frostbite and sheep. |
1 |
| Perun's Group Chat Logs |
Just Perun yelling at Veles in all caps. Ends mid-rant. |
1 |
| AFK Afternoon Break Blend |
Logout required, cozy socks recommended. |
1 |
| Excalibur Paper Cutter |
Does not make you royaly, because strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. |
1 |
| 400 Bad Request client Rooibos |
Sip. Malfunction. Repeat. |
1 |
| Fedora of Unconvincing Authority |
Great for trying to herd cats. |
1 |
| Potion of Acceptable Social Interactions |
You know why. |
1 |
| Dust Bunny Familiar |
Weak but extremely emotionally supportive. |
1 |
| Copper Ingot of Ea-Nasir (Absolutely Terrible Quality) |
You deserve better. But here we are. |
1 |
| Potion of Moderate Courage |
Face your inbox with only mild panic. |
2 |
| Slightly Haunted Diary of The Shrouded Entity |
May offer unsolicited advice at 3 AM. |
1 |
| Bottle of Pirate's Booty Rum |
Aged in the barrels of lost ships. Smells like adventure, tastes like trouble. |
1 |
| Potion of Minor Healing (Raspberry Flavor) |
Heals paper cuts, stubbed toes, and mild emotional damage. |
1 |
| Portable Hole |
A hole in space-time. Where does it go? Nobody knows. |
1 |
| Robe of Infinite Snacks |
Summon a snack at will! Beware: It is unclear where they come from. |
1 |
| Bottle of Mead of Poetry |
One sip grants you the tongue of a bard. Two sips make you unbearable at parties. |
4 |
| R3cl41m3r Splushie |
SpiP #41 - This adventurous little pilgrim insists you take him exploring through the tower and on all your journeys! Randomly recites poetry and latin phrases. Comes with tiny tarot cards, in case of emergency. |
1 |
| Ultimate Spiral Goggles |
Dope as hell. Equipped with X-Ray vision, treasure detection, fresh meat scanners, party mode and night vision. |
1 |
| Droolcup |
Limited-time accessory! Hunky DTI poster not included. |
1 |
| Sacrificial Spiral Shank |
Simple. Sharp. Efficient. Oooh! It has Spirals too! |
1 |
| Tongue-twisting Tome of Tenacious Tongues |
This tongue-in-cheek book, possibly mocking the writers almost perverse tendency to alliterate, is perfect for practicing your pronunciation or challenging your friends to a duel of diction. |
1 |
| Stealth Sandals |
Comfort, cunning and stealth. Extremely lightweight and comfy sandals for all your towering needs. They'll never hear you sneaking in these! |
1 |
| Spiral Reconnaissance |
TOP SECRET! Only for council eyes! Do not read! It's filled with secrets.. |
1 |
| Sonic Splushie |
SpiP #145 - Has a pancake on his head. If you remove his pancake he'll scream AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! |
1 |
| Fancy Spiral Bouquet |
A stunning bouquet of gorgeous roses from the Tower gardens, colorful Spiral hydrangeas and scented hyacinths. |
1 |
| Kiro's Kandy Kanes |
These aren't your ordinary candy canes! Not only do they have the delicious twisting pattern, but they'll twist your tongue too! Guaranteed you'll be speaking in tongues, but it's worth it. |
1 |
| Jingly Spiral Ornament |
A softly jingling golden little memento of celebrating Christmas 2024 in the Spiral Tower. |
1 |
| Cliffy's Festive Froggies |
It is FLUSHmas, my dudes. |
1 |
| Flushmas Pizza |
Fresh meat, blood dressing, mustard and some nice fresh veggies served on a delightful gingerbread crust. |
1 |
| Emotional Support |
There for you, friend. |
1 |
| Nylockians Sex Tape |
In the mood for this limited edition crotch pizza extravaganza? Outrageously hot, steamy, XXX rated and banned in 69 countries!! |
1 |
| How To Spiral 101 |
What is this place? What do the numbers mean? Help, I got flushed? Find weird answers for all your questions! |
3 |
| Fluffy Mug |
Almost looks like a pet! You cannot tell exactly where to pour your drink, so it's best to just wing it, and suck the beverage off the tufts of fluff. Yum! |
1 |
| Seal Splushie v2 |
SpiP #011 - This sweet and slippery companion will be tough to squish! Thrives basking in sunlight, preferably in a cool spot. Might provide you with ice for your drinks if you take him bathing! Bucket of fish included. |
1 |
| Haunted Spiral Coin |
Proof of surviving Halloween 2024 in the clutches of the spooky Spiral. |
1 |
| Sidekick Spirit |
The presence of a once flushed friend, always by your side. Summon the Stowerling you miss dearly, or gift this to a friend to always be around them, in the good and the bad. |
1 |
| Flusher Costume |
FLUSH! FLUSH! FLUSH! Now you have become the Flusher, the bringer of soaks, the tricker of treats! |
1 |
| Soothing Spiral Tea |
A bag of the tastiest blend from the Spiral gardens. Hints of spiralian roses, turnips, mustard and steel. You'll be surprised how soothing it is! |
2 |
| Great Tales of the Safari |
Jump into this epic adventure of action-packed safari madness and wicked fun animal facts! Written by Ye Olde Safariya Guie Scott! Better get it autographed! |
1 |
| Fabulous Bouquet |
Absolutley beautifully arranged bouquet. Anyone receiving one would surely be flattered. |
1 |
| Towering Tulips |
The most gorgeous tulips from the Spiral gardens, grown with that special....fertilizer. Intoxicating scent, may cause hallucinations. Colors as bright as your presence, as strong as your spirit. Wow! |
1 |
| Feels |
I feel you. I felt that. You feel me? All the feels. |
1 |
| Spiral Cloak of Confusion |
Confused? Wanting to confuse further? This is the cloak for masters of kung-fusion and conning cultusion. What? Ah, working as intended. |
1 |
| Magicked Notebook |
When you look at a page, it transcribes the notes you want to take automatically. Sometimes it's a little eager, though, and will write down stuff you wanted to keep secret. |
1 |
| Lover's Bead |
One of a pair, the owners of each half are soulmates. Whether they like it or not. |
1 |
| Sunday Sundae |
A declicious assortment of your favorite ice cream flavors, magically topped with your favorite toppings, if any. There's a special 'Tower' flavor, if you're so bold to try. |
1 |
| Root 88 Dagger |
Exquisitly made, but it's wooden. |
1 |
| Nylockian Phalluses |
Almost as beautiful as the Fabulous Bouquet (not really). |
1 |
| Stower Pelt Hair |
What a pelt! So beautiful! Warm! Thick! Lustrous! Cuddly! Burly! What animal is it from? That's.. That's besides the point. Just look at it! |
1 |
| Chocolate Spiral Tower |
A swirly depiction of the Tower with each floor being a different flavor of white, dark or milk chocolate. WARNING: Over 9000 floors. Might cause nausea. |
1 |
| ReactsWithWords Splushie |
SpiP #058 - YES, he reacts to your words! No pre-recorded jargon! Comes with a MASSIVE stack of teeny tiny maps & floor plans and a cool tour guide hat. You'll never be lost if you have him along. Also functions as a brilliant little jukebox. |
1 |
| Mylvee Splushie |
SpiP #104 - hungry. bites you. prions are scary. dinat dinat do. death by glamour. milk. two planets approach the roche limit. bal man. walk don't run. battle for dream island. we are eternal. eepy. |
1 |
| S'tower Tartan Kilt |
Adorned with the unique spiral tartan, complete with sporran for ones pebbles and a pleat that guarantees it will only fly up at the most appropriate of times. Goes well with any robe and dagger! |
1 |
| S.H.I.T Power Alert |
Love greeting fresh meat? Are you confusingly helpful?Are you definitely not affiliated with any sort of cult? This is THE batsignal for the Spiral Helper Info Team! Big flashy button! MEEP, MEEP, FRESH MEAT DETECTED! Get yours NOW! |
1 |
| Eel Worship Tart |
The traditional holy dish of the Spiral Tower. Served and offered at every special event, birthday, holiday and sacrifice. Shall NOT be yucked, chucked or disrespected. 'Tis sacred. |
1 |
| The Spiral Towel |
Don't forget to bring a towel! Perhaps THE most important item you should always have with you in the Spiral, especially on fridays. |
1 |
| Lore Whip Taters |
The bestest organic tower-taters, lovingly grown, having passed of old age and filled with wisdom - this whip is steeped in delicious Stower lore. |
1 |
| Hunky DTI Poster |
Adorn your floor with this rare and smoldering vintage poster of the Master of the Tower. Droolcup not included. |
3 |
| Stower Speedos |
Funky, slick and hotter than the basement furnace. Perfect for slip-n-sliding down some flushy pipes and basking at the pool. All eyes on you! |
1 |
| Cloak of Concealment |
This cloak doesn't just hide you from sight – it also makes you completely forgettable! Perfect for avoiding awkward conversations, and generally blending into the background. Matching it with the Glittering Gloves of Gripping and Grabbing Attention will make you an ordinary amount of memorable. |
1 |
| Octarine Lollipop |
Each eighth lick tastes like a different kind of chaos. |
1 |
| Spiral Summer Hits Vol 1 |
The hottest mixtape this summer! Includes the hits: Who Left The Meat Out, Party Flush Anthem, and Hunky Town. |
1 |
| Stealth Dagger 3000 |
Be the stealthiest rogue at any sacrifice. Camouflages into anything you're wearing. Needs no cleaning. |
1 |
| Inflatable FLUSH Suit |
In case of flushing, the suit automatically inflates making your FLUSH a luxurious and relaxing float as you go for a joyride down the pipes. |
1 |
| Gryphon's Gourmet Grub |
These gourmet rations are fit for a king – or at least a gryphon. Its seeds. Just seeds, but the name makes you want them more, right? Right? |
1 |
| Sustainable Robe |
Stitched together from pre-owned pieces of fabrics gathered from flushed sacrifices. |
1 |
| Pocket-sized Port-a-Portal Parchment |
This magical parchment, paired with a crayon of your choice, allows adventurers to create temporary portals to different levels of the endless tower. |
2 |
| Ruby Slippers |
With a click of your heels, you're teleported down to the Tower Gardens. |
1 |
| Pizza Pie Dagger |
The true multi-purpose dagger for all your sacrificial, pizza slicin' and pie cuttin' needs! |
1 |
| Camouflage Boots |
Essential wear for any trekking, climbing, hiding, hunting and sacrificing Stowerling. Goes especially well with the Camp-robes. |
1 |
| Handmade Card |
I made this with my own little hands, you couldn't wish for more! Fingerpaints, glitter and stickers galore! Hugs. |
1 |
| Asherjade Splushie |
SpiP #032 - A feisty little fisherman from the Tower mote! Tiny model airplane, fancy fishing lures and delicious pie included. |
1 |
| Spiral Gang Membership |
You're in it now. Includes instructions to secret booty shake and how to make the perfect mustard sandwich. |
1 |
| Party Robe |
Colorful, charming and utterly cool. Tailored to your perfect measurements, unbelievably flattering and dapper! Get your groove on at any party or sacrifice. |
1 |
| Child-made Lemonade |
Has whole chunks of lemon. How it was made was questionable. |
1 |
| Spartan Monkey Splushie |
SpiP #003 - A wise little monkey with a crown of bananas and a tinkering kit. Boop his nose and he'll shout THIS. IS. SPIRAL!!! |
1 |
| Book of Kiro |
Full of wisdom, questionable doodles and linguistic goodness. You may not understand it all, but damn it's cute! |
1 |
| The One Token |
Celebrated the One year anniversary of the Tower, took part in the sacrificial blood ritual and had some pie. |
2 |
| DTI's Fatherly Hug |
Now, this is very rare. And he'll never admit to it, but nonetheless, you got it. Cherish it. |
1 |
| Brainrot in a Jar |
Harvested far away from the tower, from the upper shallows of....outer reddit. It's continuously rotting, yet alive. It's fascinating. |
1 |
| Chocolate Kiro |
Valentines Day is coming! And what could be cuter and sweeter than a little chocolate Kiro! Made from organic Spiral Chocolate! |
1 |
| Extreme Backpack |
You've never seen a backpack like this! It looks SO cool and it fits...everything. Yes, literally EVERYTHING. Don't ask how. There might be a time-space continuum in there. |
1 |
| Bag o' Tricks |
Full of nefarious goodies. Maybe it has something that will help you steal an item off of someone else. |
1 |
| Spiral Studies 304 |
Someone seems to have dropped their notes from their Spiral Studies class.. Interesting. |
1 |
| Floor Floosher 4000 |
Syrup on your ceiling? Pesky slices of pizza on the floor? Not anymore! Your personal Floor Floosher can clean your floor in under 94 hours! |
1 |
| Tower Rations |
A tin of essentials; clump of fresh meat, 1 x celery cake, 1 x spiral baguette, box of \"raisins\", 1 x sippy-cup of sacrificial juice. |
2 |
| Sexy Sinjury Poster |
Depicts sauce being poured over a bunch of tentacles on a bed of rice. |
1 |
| Holy Water Bottle |
Quench your sinful thoughts or scold your demonic pals with water blessed by the Rudest of Ministers, the Pastor Sarcastor. |
1 |
| Assfuck Platter |
No, it doesn't taste like ass! It's a wholeheartedly fucked platter of absolute deliciousness! |
1 |
| Towering Tool Belt |
Holds all your essential Tower-tinkering-tools, such as your dagger, chloroform, cookies and rocks. |
1 |