| Pebbles |
The currency used in STONE. |
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| Apology Letter |
An unopened letter of apology. You can give it to someone to express regret, but you don't know what it actually says inside. |
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| Assfuck Platter |
No, it doesn't taste like ass! It's a wholeheartedly fucked platter of absolute deliciousness! |
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| Assfuck's Ginger Beer |
After some trial and error, efforts were successful! ..and there may be a finger somewhere in there. Enjoy! |
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| Bag of Spiral Delight |
This delicious assortment of candy includes: sour spirals, liquorice towers, DTI's dynamites, marshmallow Ma'ams, flushdrops, sinful squishies, bibble bubbles, musky mulberries, gummy snakes, salty daggers, tooting potatoes and fizzy frogs. |
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| Bigfoot Toenail |
It's so big, you can use it as a butter-knife! Adds a bit of flavor, too. Yum. |
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| Box of Chocolates |
You never know what you're gonna get. Except caramel, there's always some caramel in there. |
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| Bubble Robe |
How...how does it even stay together? The bubbles won't break. It's mesmerizing. |
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| Burst Bubble |
Oh no, what's left of it? |
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| Child-made Lemonade |
Has whole chunks of lemon. How it was made was questionable. |
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| Commemorative Eggplant |
'Member when the Tower flooded with eggplants? I 'member. |
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| Commemorative Pumpkin |
I celebrated Halloween in the Tower 2023! BOO! |
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| DTI's Fatherly Hug |
Now, this is very rare. And he'll never admit to it, but nonetheless, you got it. Cherish it. |
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| Droolcup |
Limited-time accessory! Hunky DTI poster not included. |
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| Elwis The Raptor |
Blessed by an Old God, he survived the great dinocalypse and settled down in the Spiral. Loves him some tender meat, and Elvis. You need to be prepared to sing and scower the pipes for some tenderized meat. |
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| Emergency Blanket |
For: very serious emergencies, chilly toes and escaping ghastly apparitions. |
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| Emotional Support |
There for you, friend. |
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| Five Hundred Cigarettes |
What did you expect? Cigs are expensive. |
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| Fluffy Mug |
Almost looks like a pet! You cannot tell exactly where to pour your drink, so it's best to just wing it, and suck the beverage off the tufts of fluff. Yum! |
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| Forsaken Originals |
Are you feelin' adventurous? No one is quite sure what this dish exactly is but.. I mean.. At least it's original? |
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| Free Hugs |
Sometimes a good hug is very important. And so are you, friend. |
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| Fuzzy Maal Wall Rug |
Garish and captivating, extra fuzzy, massively muscly and decorated with sparkly beads. Hand-woven by skilled tentacles. Also doubles as a warm quilt. |
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| Giggle Gummy Bears |
Bursts into fits of barely controlled laughter when you bite into it. Has the same effect on you in approximately 30 minutes later. |
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| Golem Carving Kit |
Assemble your own emotional support rock. |
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| Goofball |
A ball of goof. |
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| Googly Eyes |
What are you looking at? WHO are you looking at?! Everything man, everything! Even hindsight ain't 20/20 anymore! |
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| Hair of a Strudelmeister |
Dropped by a mythical creature and said to bring very good luck to its holder. |
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| Happy Memory |
Not sure to whom this belongs. Perhaps you can help find it's proper owner. |
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| Haunted Spiral Coin |
Proof of surviving Halloween 2024 in the clutches of the spooky Spiral. |
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| Holy Water Bottle |
Quench your sinful thoughts or scold your demonic pals with water blessed by the Rudest of Ministers, the Pastor Sarcastor. |
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| Hunky Bibbleskit Poster |
As requested by DTI! |
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| Hunky DTI Costume |
Be the man himself! Banhammer, yorkshire pudding and english accent included. |
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| Hunky DTI Poster |
Adorn your floor with this rare and smoldering vintage poster of the Master of the Tower. Droolcup not included. |
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| Interesting Tower Statistics |
A big top secret dossier of incredibly interesting statistics gathered by ReactsWithWords. Shh! Now you know it all! |
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| Lucifer Splushie |
SpiP #666 - Our tiny overlord in all his glory! Pitchfork, hellfire and evil plans included. Only available on Halloween. |
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| Nervous Ball of Wreck |
A deceivingly small metallic orb the size of a marble. Capable of relieving 5 pints worth of stress per day, or wrecking 3000 tons of any materia by a light flick of it - your choice. |
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| Non-descript Cup |
Definitely not full of your favorite alcohol. Grab a few and give em out to your friends! |
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| Octarine Lollipop |
Each eighth lick tastes like a different kind of chaos. |
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| Pancake Barbie |
Throw her at the ceiling and she'll stick! Syrup not included. |
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| Parlor Tit Wheels |
No, you perv! These are the cutest tits in the Tower! Sultan tits, sombre tits and great tits! You're like a Disney princess with these little tits swirling around you in a wheel formation, chirping happily. |
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| Popy Robe |
Honesty, this might actually be an old pope's robe. White, purple and gold, fancy embroidery, a couple of pockets. Comes with holy water, golden slippers and a fancy hat too! |
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| Potatoes |
PO-TA-TOES. |
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| Potion of Poppycock |
Made of poppies, stinks of cock. Gives you to ability to detect any lie, deception or scheme that may be afoot. |
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| Quail |
It's cute and edible! |
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| Replacement Joints |
Not sure if it will help, but the sign says it will. |
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| Robe of Ruckus |
This shaggy robe is a pure delight! Huge hood with floppy ears, 25 hidden pockets, strange gadgets, trinkets and surprises which vary with each one of these robes. You kinda look like Scooby Doo! |
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| S.H.I.T Power Alert |
Love greeting fresh meat? Are you confusingly helpful?Are you definitely not affiliated with any sort of cult? This is THE batsignal for the Spiral Helper Info Team! Big flashy button! MEEP, MEEP, FRESH MEAT DETECTED! Get yours NOW! |
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| Safari Scott Splushie |
SpiP #013 - Equipped with full safari-gear and all kinds of wild tales of epic adventures! |
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| Scary Stories of the Tower |
An anthology of bone-chilling and cursed tales. The pages were found behind a bricked up wall in the tombs.. |
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| Secret Safari Maps |
Meticulously crafted by the man, the myth and the Scott himself. Ready for an adventure? If you can't bring Scott with you, this is the next best thing to have. |
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| Sexy Sinjury Poster |
Depicts sauce being poured over a bunch of tentacles on a bed of rice. |
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| Sidekick Spirit |
The presence of a once flushed friend, always by your side. Summon the Stowerling you miss dearly, or gift this to a friend to always be around them, in the good and the bad. |
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| Sinjury Costume |
Move in the shadows, spreading glitter wherever you go. Very tentacly, extra squish. |
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| Soothing Spiral Tea |
A bag of the tastiest blend from the Spiral gardens. Hints of spiralian roses, turnips, mustard and steel. You'll be surprised how soothing it is! |
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| Spiral Gang Membership |
You're in it now. Includes instructions to secret booty shake and how to make the perfect mustard sandwich. |
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| Spiral Sundress |
A classically beautiful floral print with beautiful spiral detailing. Flows in the sunlight, glows in moonlight. Gorgeous! |
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| Spiral Supernova |
A delightfully gigormous bouquet of freshly picked flowers from the Spiral gardens. The colors are a feast for the eyes and the scent is almost as lovely as you! |
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| Spiral Tower Barbie |
A rare Barbie that never got mass produced. She has curly hair, a beautiful retro robe with spiral patterns, hypnotizing goggles, pizza, a dagger, and a poodle. |
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| Spongy Dagger |
Shhh! It's foam! Don't tell anyone! Looks super real, and is handy when you're just not feelin' it and ain't really in a sacrificin' mood, but don't wanna be left out or a party pooper. |
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| Steve Schaubs Library Card |
Grants the bearer permanent access (no more need for day passes) to the Franksgard University Library, its collections, and its workshops. |
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| Stower Pelt Hair |
What a pelt! So beautiful! Warm! Thick! Lustrous! Cuddly! Burly! What animal is it from? That's.. That's besides the point. Just look at it! |
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| Stuffing |
Yo we heard you like stuffing?! So we put some stuff in your stuffing so you can stuff it in some stuff!!. |
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| Super Bowl Ring |
What do you mean false advertising? It's a really super bowl-ring! Fits a teaspoon of rice or cereal easy! |
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| Sweet Spiral Salad |
The freshest salad you'll ever have! Put together by the turtles in the hedge maze gardens. Might contain traces of lots of stuff.. But that's what makes it good! |
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| Sword of Regret |
'Ah, dang. Why did I buy this?' |
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| Teeny Tiny Tussie Mussie |
The finest of flowers, so colorful and small. No words are needed, for the flowers say it all. |
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| The (Other) Anarchist's Cookbook |
Some dishes may require… special ingredients. |
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| The One Token |
Celebrated the One year anniversary of the Tower, took part in the sacrificial blood ritual and had some pie. |
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| To-Don't List |
A crumpled scroll of things you should definitely not do. Updates hourly. |
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| Towering Lollipop |
Boasting a whopping 164cm (3 bald eagles and a coconut), the towering lollipop swirls towards the sky in a colorful spiral, with 58 different flavors and textures! |
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| Towering Tulips |
The most gorgeous tulips from the Spiral gardens, grown with that special....fertilizer. Intoxicating scent, may cause hallucinations. Colors as bright as your presence, as strong as your spirit. Wow! |
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| UnU Splushie |
SpiP #012 - Fluffy, cute and fierce! As the king, she comes equipped with a tiny crown, customized art and a tiny alien companion. |
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| Very Impressed Wife |
Is your wife continously unimpressed? Turn your life around with the very impressed wife! Nothing disappoints her! No, not even you! |
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| hampter |
hampter |
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