redditistreason's Inventory (safe)

Item Description
7821 o The currency used in SPONGE.
Towering Tulips The most gorgeous tulips from the Spiral gardens, grown with that special....fertilizer. Intoxicating scent, may cause hallucinations. Colors as bright as your presence, as strong as your spirit. Wow!
Bioluminescent Robe Gives you that fungal glow, without the spores. Probably.
Spider Silk Robe Indestructible and insanely light, let's you move like a shadow. Weaved by Spiralian Tower Spiders.
Ineffable Robe of Bureaucratic Invisibility Makes you entirely unnoticeable to any government agency. Including the tax office.
Sustainable Robe Stitched together from pre-owned pieces of fabrics gathered from flushed sacrifices.
400 Bad Request client Rooibos Sip. Malfunction. Repeat.
Basic Black Robe Gets the job done, just like you. Built-in holster for your dagger, hidden pocket and light as a feather
Reversible Robe Dramatically sparkly and edgy on one side, soft and nap-friendly on the other.
Bubble Robe How...how does it even stay together? The bubbles won't break. It's mesmerizing.
Stealth Dagger 3000 Be the stealthiest rogue at any sacrifice. Camouflages into anything you're wearing. Needs no cleaning.
Ultimate Robe 9000 Shine. Stealth. Tassels. Pockets. Straps. Hooks. Gadgets. Power. Prestige. Glory.
Red Satin Robe Shiny, smooth and flowing, with medium pockets and a color that hides bloodstains perfectly.
Camouflage Robe Perfect for ambushing and stalking fresh meat in the hedge maze. Big hood, many pockets, waterproof.
Dagger of Ice This shiny blade is made of never-melting ice. Cold to the touch, it will refrigerate any beverage in under a second, just dip the tip in and enjoy! Please don't stab anyone in the heart though, that won't end well.
Assfuck Splushie SpiP #269 - He's dressed exactly as you'd expect. Randomly asks if you have a Pornhub account. He's adorable, though.
Ugly Flushmas Sweater 2025 There are so many names stitched into this sweater that it's become illegible. A sore for sight eyes.
6 Star Dragon Ball They say if you collect all 7, you are granted one wish