| Pebbles |
The currency used in STONE. |
1260o |
| 2 Star Dragon Ball |
They say if you collect all 7, you are granted one wish. |
1 |
| A Random Nog |
The ingredients may be a bit blurry, but don't worry, so will you. Just keep enjoying! |
1 |
| AFK Afternoon Break Blend |
Logout required, cozy socks recommended. |
1 |
| Argyle Ascot |
Attractive accessories are altogether appropriate, and always ardently appreciated. |
1 |
| Assfuck Platter |
No, it doesn't taste like ass! It's a wholeheartedly fucked platter of absolute deliciousness! |
1 |
| Auntie Ev Splushie |
SpiP #335 - The sweetest badass auntie of the Tower! Always ready with a tiny whip and a cuppa tea! |
1 |
| Azure Dagger |
Glistens like lightning and glows when it rains. Forged from the finest blue Spiralian Steel. |
1 |
| Bag o' Tricks |
Full of nefarious goodies. Maybe it has something that will help you steal an item off of someone else. |
1 |
| Bag of Spiral Delight |
This delicious assortment of candy includes: sour spirals, liquorice towers, DTI's dynamites, marshmallow Ma'ams, flushdrops, sinful squishies, bibble bubbles, musky mulberries, gummy snakes, salty daggers, tooting potatoes and fizzy frogs. |
1 |
| Boat of Beans |
Bath time will never be boring again! Turn your dull bathwater into a delicious soup and sail away with your fancy and edible bath-time-boat! |
1 |
| Bottle of Mead of Poetry |
One sip grants you the tongue of a bard. Two sips make you unbearable at parties. |
1 |
| Braaaaaaains |
The less questions you ask, the better. Very nutritious, despite the low IQ. |
1 |
| Cactus Pencil (Mildly Spiky) |
Improves spelling and handwriting via threat. |
1 |
| Child-made Lemonade |
Has whole chunks of lemon. How it was made was questionable. |
1 |
| Cloak of Dramatic Billowing |
Just epic flair. Perfect for grand entrances and exits alike. |
1 |
| Commemorative Eggplant |
'Member when the Tower flooded with eggplants? I 'member. |
1 |
| Cookie Cannon |
Make cookies, not organ donations!! |
1 |
| Cosmic Spiral Rucksack |
Sturdy and dagger-proof! Changes color depending on your mood. Pockets and holders for your daggers, robe, even your swiss hot chocolate! Hidden compartment containing a black hole, for.. reasons. |
1 |
| Curious Caterpillar |
Quite the inexpensive little buddy! Travels in your pocket and asks lots of questions. |
1 |
| Don't Panic Danish |
Served on an artisanal sugar towel. |
1 |
| Droolcup |
Limited-time accessory! Hunky DTI poster not included. |
1 |
| Edgar Allan Poe's Travel Umbrella |
Always forecasts ‘dreary.’ |
1 |
| Edible Plastic |
After all, why shouldn't you eat it? |
1 |
| Endless Spud Splushie |
SpiP #101 - PO-TA-TOES! The goodest little squishy spud. Very apeeling. Don't dip him in yogurt, please. |
1 |
| FLUSH! T-Shirt |
I SURVIVED THE FLUSH AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET THIS T-SHIRT, I BOUGHT IT! |
1 |
| Fairy Dust Pop Rocks |
Makes you sparkle. |
1 |
| Fine Spiral Cufflinks |
Pure gold, mined from the depths underneath the Sparlor. Be the best dressed gent at every YEET. |
1 |
| Fire Flower Seeds |
Grow your own Super Fire Flowers. When consumed, you can shoot fireballs! Or make some BBQ anywhere, either way. |
1 |
| Fuzzy Maal Wall Rug |
Garish and captivating, extra fuzzy, massively muscly and decorated with sparkly beads. Hand-woven by skilled tentacles. Also doubles as a warm quilt. |
1 |
| Giant Slinky |
You've always wanted one as a kid. Finally, your dream has come true. |
1 |
| Grumpy Gerbil |
He enjoys yelping at the clouds. Calms down if you put Disney movies on. |
1 |
| Handmade Card |
I made this with my own little hands, you couldn't wish for more! Fingerpaints, glitter and stickers galore! Hugs. |
1 |
| Haunted Spiral Coin |
Proof of surviving Halloween 2024 in the clutches of the spooky Spiral. |
1 |
| Hefty Ceramic Mug |
Fired in the hellfire below the tower, this massive mug will serve as a daily workout as you sip your favourite beverage or sacrificial wine. |
1 |
| Holiday Halberd |
The craftsmanship is immaculate. Cut down your enemies with cheer! |
1 |
| Hyperintelligent Shade of the Color Blue |
A wearable hue and familiar that causes existential dread in all philosophers. |
1 |
| Infinite Improbabili-tea |
Tastes different every time, sometimes before you drink it. |
1 |
| Inkwell |
It never seems to run dry, but tipping it over doesn't cause a spill. Curious. It writes like a dream, too. |
1 |
| Jingly Spiral Ornament |
A softly jingling golden little memento of celebrating Christmas 2024 in the Spiral Tower. |
1 |
| Knife Pen |
Honestly this knife doesn't write very well, but it'll open your letters, and probably your palm. |
1 |
| Left Boot of Unstable Teleportation |
Take a step, end up anywhere! Works best with a sense of adventure (and low self-preservation). |
1 |
| Lip-Teeth Arrows |
Honestly? The most disgusting weapon. Dug out from an old locker in that one room, you know? You know the room. Shoot someone with this and if the wound doesn't kill them, the horror will. |
1 |
| Lore Whip Taters |
The bestest organic tower-taters, lovingly grown, having passed of old age and filled with wisdom - this whip is steeped in delicious Stower lore. |
1 |
| Lovely Duckling |
It's just swell. |
1 |
| Lovely Lactase Pills |
An easy to chew and swallow pill. Eradicates your intolerance. Not just for milk, though. |
1 |
| Luxurious Robe |
Made from the plushest velvet known to man, with gold trim and embroidered with your number. |
1 |
| Magicked Notebook |
When you look at a page, it transcribes the notes you want to take automatically. Sometimes it's a little eager, though, and will write down stuff you wanted to keep secret. |
1 |
| Modular Bookmark |
Includes 12 detachable tabs and a tiny flag. |
1 |
| Morgoth's Unlimited High Quality Charcuterie Board |
Pairs well with wine, doom, and utter dominion over Arda. |
1 |
| Muninn |
One of Odin's ravens. To the slain he flies. |
1 |
| Nondescript Box Marked 'Definitely Not a Mimic' |
Contains either loot or teeth. Sometimes both. |
1 |
| Octarine Lollipop |
Each eighth lick tastes like a different kind of chaos. |
1 |
| Pack of Blood |
What do you mean? Of course it's fake blood.. Why? What have you heard? |
1 |
| Party Apples |
They're totally groovy and always jammin'! Please don't eat them, as they rematerialize almost instantly. That's not a groovy time for you. |
1 |
| Pen Knife |
This pen probably isn't mightier than a sword, but at least you can sign your name with it.. In blood. |
1 |
| Pills |
Discarded bag of colorful pills, found underneath the floorboards of the Tower Library. |
1 |
| Poooooorridge |
How many o's are in a porridge? So many, you can't eat this porridge without going OOOOOOO! |
1 |
| Portable Hole |
A hole in space-time. Where does it go? Nobody knows. |
1 |
| Potatoes |
PO-TA-TOES. |
1 |
| Potion of Minor Healing (Raspberry Flavor) |
Heals paper cuts, stubbed toes, and mild emotional damage. |
1 |
| Ragnarök Insurance |
Can you afford not to buy it? |
1 |
| Scroll of Very Mild Revenge |
Mostly generates passive-aggressive Post-its. |
1 |
| Shiny Spiral Ornament |
I celebrated christmas 2023 in the Tower! Just don't tell anyone what I did at the Christmas party.. |
1 |
| Sinewy Spiral Sweets |
Crafted in the old laboratory, our mad scientists have finally done it! They've perfected the plag...the, perfect way to make sweets out of...meats! Yum! |
1 |
| Sinjury Injury |
I paid 2000 pebbles for this and all I got was a slap from a tentacle. |
1 |
| Spiral Chandelier |
Classy yet narcaleptically inhospitable. |
1 |
| Spiral Ring |
The most beautiful Spiralian silver with mustard crystals. Has calming, healing, delicious and cozy properties. |
1 |
| Spiral Tower Biscuit Tin |
Filled with ginger crush creams, viennese, ballerina cookies, wagon wheels, dog treats, assorted buttons, business cards and that weird tomato with pins stuck in it. Blame Grandma. |
1 |
| Squishy Tentacles of Cheer |
Like a squish in pastry form! Baked with love by a thousand tentacles, quite quickly too! Squishy texture, creamy filling, and sprinkles on top, of course. Qam oou iilth ez i awtgsshu amun on'ma! |
1 |
| Stealth Sandals |
Comfort, cunning and stealth. Extremely lightweight and comfy sandals for all your towering needs. They'll never hear you sneaking in these! |
1 |
| Sunday Sundae |
A declicious assortment of your favorite ice cream flavors, magically topped with your favorite toppings, if any. There's a special 'Tower' flavor, if you're so bold to try. |
1 |
| The One Token |
Celebrated the One year anniversary of the Tower, took part in the sacrificial blood ritual and had some pie. |
1 |
| Tiny Flag |
Plant it on something tiny and pretend it's yours! |
1 |
| Tongue-twisting Tome of Tenacious Tongues |
This tongue-in-cheek book, possibly mocking the writer’s almost perverse tendency to alliterate, is perfect for practicing your pronunciation or challenging your friends to a duel of diction. |
1 |
| Towel-Share Trip |
Like a time-share trip, but with towels! So grab a buddy and head off to a towely adventure, yey! |
1 |
| Tower Rations |
A tin of essentials; clump of fresh meat, 1 x celery cake, 1 x spiral baguette, box of \"raisins\", 1 x sippy-cup of sacrificial juice. |
1 |
| Tower Towel |
Just about the most massively useful thing that one can carry |
2 |
| Towering Tool Belt |
Holds all your essential Tower-tinkering-tools, such as your dagger, chloroform, cookies and rocks. |
1 |
| Velvet Curtains |
Luxurious, heavy, and sure to keep the light out of your room. |
1 |
| Weird Pretzels |
The lye ain't no lie! But they are suspiciously delicuous. |
1 |
| Zarking Fardwangle Fizzbombs |
Explodes in your mouth. In a good way. Usually. |
1 |